firstworldproblem | IC Inbox 2 (Imeeji)

It's full of life.

There aren't people here but it doesn't make me feel lonely even if I'm alone in here. It helps when the pier is not enough to calm me down.

Then I will do well to remember it. I would want to recreate this place for you when we are no longer stuck here.

[He does look over at the pond area as he stands taking his hand.]

That is quite the thoughtful addition.

It was. I hadn't expected fishes, but it's nice.

[ he squeezes his hand lightly, enjoying the contact and being close to him like this ]

And the place in general is especially nice when it gives me a perfect excuse to put my lovely fiancé to work.

I do have some serious matters to discuss first, though, if it will not ruin the mood

I expect you would considering all that has happened.

[He sits in the grass trying to tuck him down with him.]

And we can reward ourselves with planting once the heavy topics are over.

[ he sits down with him, moving onto his lap and wrapping his arms around his neck right away ]

First I wanted to ask if you've talked with Levity, since you mentioned that. ... and how it went.

It’s ... better.

I am more convinced he will become a useless sad pile on the floor in regards to our work than actually actively an adversary.

That’s not much better but I take it you have reached an understanding regarding his scolding.

[ leaning in to kiss his cheek, and then press his forehead against his ]

How are you feeling?

On the contrary, that I can handle much better, draining as it can be at times.

[He wraps his arms around him.]

How do I feel?

I don’t believe he realizes he was even acting in such a manner. And I would not entertain discussion on the Sundering if we could not handle a topic as simple as game strategy.

We did try to separate them, acceptance versus understanding. He will come around to the second easier than the first. He might not agree or be able to execute a Baritone’s strategy, and I would not want him to if it made him uncomfortable, but he at least isn’t throwing it a careless an eye as before.

And it is difficult because he sees injuring others in games a willful act on a unit’s part. As long as he believes that then, yes, it will always be easier to judge, easier to hurt and be hurt. Lily also has this problem. And where else is the guilt and frustration to go when you believe that?

And I have been keeping him at arm’s length. Hiding in the ways that I do. I will need to be more open if the bond is to flourish.

Though there is one very dreadful thing…

He doesn’t laugh at my morbid jokes like you do.

Well. He does tend to be a judgmental asshole which is how all of our arguments begun. But if he manages to come around then that's good.

There's no saving his sense of humor, though.

He has been harsh at times. Struggling as he has been to find himself. But let us see where it leads.

While it was quite tiring, it was needed. And now I have moments with you where I can relax.

And do not take this as a means that you must also make up with him. You do have enough on your plate.

We've reached an understanding last time we talked, so it isn't as if there's anything to make up for. I just don't like judgemental behavior.

[ he'll lean in to kiss his cheek again ]

But I am glad to hear things are working toward a direction you might be happier with. You deserve it.

And I had another matter to discuss, regarding Ardbert.

Ah, your prediction came true. I did try to play nice.

And what of our Hero from the First?

It was a fear more than a prediction which I suspect is why it came true.

But regardless. I did end up discussing a few matters with him, and I figured hiding the basics of our plans would do more harm than good, so. I told him. He's willing to let us have a timeline.

Were you worried he would not?

I know your feelings are complicated on the matter, so I would like to hear them.

Thancred wasn't receptive about it initially. Even after explaining that we would reset the timeline, rather than kill everyone on each shard to force a rejoining, he still didn't like it.

It took us getting close for him to even consider it.

Ardbert did have a different experience, so I suppose it makes sense he's willing to not stand in our way even if he's not exactly happy with you.

But it is more complicated with the hero than it is Thancred, is it not?

I know you are dealing with jealousy and perhaps even feelings of inadequacy. Couple that with how you feel for him and sympathize with him.

... It is complicated, yes.

[ which means that he nailed it ]

I'd like to secure his cooperation, or as close as we can get to it, both because I feel for him and because he has the potential of being a threat. My ... other feelings. Are not tied to it.

Ever have you been able to put duty before your personal feelings, but that does not mean they burden you so.

[He kisses the top of his head.]

If we can find him a place, a star, he can live, I would like that as well.

I think he'd need to hear that from you. But that would be nice, wouldn't it.

[ he'll just cuddle up to him, they can garden in a second. ]

I know how it feels to be surrounded by people again after so long. To experience physical touch again. I tried to help him with some of the more overwhelming parts, but he'll have to do most of the work himself.

Not yet. I think he would not think it genuine. He needs more time to warm up. If we ever make it there.

[He wraps his arms up more around his shoulders stroking his hair.]

It must be overwhelming just as it was for you. How long was it before you were able to relax into a hug? But more than that I think knowing he can go to you, that you will understand, and not tell him to brush off his fears does more good than you know. A bit of a safety net to fall back to.

Right now it definitely would not give you any points. If anything he'd think you're trying to manipulate him again. ... But I am glad that you truly are making an effort.

And I'm proud of you.

I always am, but well. I figured I should tell you.

It is truly terrible I value your opinion enough to make an effort. Lahabrea would never request such of me.

[Translation: Your heartfelt declaration of being proud does warm my heart.]

[ he can tell he's being sour to deflect ]

So terrible indeed. How will you survive me trying to push you into doing something that will benefit you.

I suppose it just comes with the rest of the package. How dour that it is to my benefit.

[He leans his forehead against his.]

Though as much as I wish the best for that hero, I do hope a speaking with him helps your own experiences. Perhaps give some peace to the loneliness, the journey you have walked thus far.

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

1/2

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378

Re: Day 378