firstworldproblem | IC Inbox 2 (Imeeji)

I don't know. I'd say I've always been the one he's had the least power over but is that true when I badly wanted to shove into his face how much better than him I was?

I want to understand him, but I froze when I saw him and I ended up feeling like an idiot when I told him my name and he clearly didn't give a shit.

I'm not expecting for love from him but I was hoping for something productive.

[ he takes a sip of the New Improved Drink Choice and seems satisfied with it ]

The drinking is part of the experience so you getting me drunk immediately wouldn't have the same effect.

[He runs a hand slowly through Five’s hair once.]

And in this I have no good advice. I could teach you a hundred ways to manipulate another to be fond of you, but that is neither your style nor intent.

But I do believe I know what you want from him. You want him to acknowledge you. To be proud of you. An act he never gave you. To give meaning and perhaps closure to your difficult childhood.

[He lets Five have his new drink and sips on his old one.]

Well he can't give me any of that. And as much as I don't want to defend him in any capacity he doesn't owe it to me or any of my siblings. From this point in time he hasn't even been considering adopting us.

Logically I know all that and the fact I had any hope for anything different for even half a second is just entirely stupid of me.

It's just my heart hasn't caught up to my brain and thanks to a certain someone I haven't been as good about ignoring it lately.

There are yet a few paths forward, but first.

[He pulls him into his lap.]

I love you. Respect you. Admire you. Not a day goes by when I am not in awe of your strength and your compassion. Yours is not an easy road, yet not many walk it with such skill as you.

[ he can't handle this kind of talk right now. He'll let him pull him into his lap and immediately hide his face on his shoulder, staying quiet but wrapping his arms around him and keeping him there. ]

[He kisses the top of his head and rubs his back softly.]

You need naught prove yourself to anyone, my dear. Myself included. You’re remarkable the way you are, and I look forward to watching you grow.

[ he gives him a weak nod and somehow manages not to cry despite the fact he very much feels like it ]

Well. Then you'll be happy to know I apologized to Levity.

[wut]

Why?

He's a clueless moron, he's not malicious.

No. He is not malicious.

But I don’t believe you were in the wrong either.

I’m simply surprised.

I wasn't in the wrong either, no. And I'm still not going to be able to trust him. But at least I explained why he shouldn't tell me what to do with my siblings and why it hurts me if he insists on forcing his presence on me when I'm asking him to leave me alone.

Apparently he was under the impression that since it worked for you it would work for him.

I was just being stubborn, anyway.

Ah, I might have given him the advice to make you slightly uncomfortable was how our friendship did blossom, but I suppose I do have the experience in fine manipulation.

[He kisses the top of his head.]

Thank you.

[ that actually earns him a small smile because it's a little funny ]

He is definitely not a talented manipulator, no.

... You're welcome.

[It is a little funny.]

Defeated by my own advice I see. Well, I will be keeping it to myself in regards to Hythlodaeus for a while.

[He pets his hair again.]

You truly are always looking out for me.

[ he shifts so he can kiss his cheek at that ]

I promised I would protect you.

I know. Can I not be marveled by it?

And you were drinking though I hope company is a better remedy.

[ He does consider finishing his drink and getting wasted all over again but eventually, instead he against hides his face on his shoulder ]

Company is a better remedy.

Will you tell me again? That you're proud of me.

[He can’t help letting a small laugh out. He is too precious.]

I am proud of you. For your wit, your strength, your kindness, your attention to detail. I would wager no one is as creative or as thoughtful as you with applications of common law.

You’ve labored. You’ve grown. And while not everything ends in success you take the opportunity to better yourself. You try and fumble in your own way with your siblings. But you’ve brought them closer. Do not doubt yourself.

You are my hope, my sun, my promised dawn. And I look forward to sharing each and every day with you.

[ He doesn't say anything to that, despite being the one to ask. Instead he places a soft kiss on his shoulder before going right back into hiding.

This might be the one of few things even Emet can't entirely fix, but it certainly feels better with him ]

[He pets his hair softly as he goes back into hiding. That’s a lot of baggage to carry around and he knows full well how a certain upbringing can scar a child for life.

He’s counted on it a couple of times.]

I could go with more embarrassing examples but I think I’ll spare you.

I'm trying to save as much of my dignity as possible so yes, I do appreciate you sparing me.

Can I steal you and keep you here with me for a few hours?

Even if you were not upset the answer would be yes. I can’t deny you.

Though I see the room has changed since my last visit.

And perhaps we can plot and scheme what you do want out of your father. ‘Tis a rare opportunity and we can’t leave him with the upper hand.

A present from Vergil. There's an onsen outside too.

[ a pause at the proposal, though ]

I could ask him if he has any powers himself. I've always wondered.

That man becomes sweeter everyday.

[He taps his chin.]

That would explain his skill at teaching you. But if you could ask him anything, what would it be?

...

...

...

If there is anything he actually ever enjoyed in his life. If he was ever happy.

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