firstworldproblem | Thread Continuations

You know I do. And that I will complain about it.

[He puts the dress up, so it hangs on a nearby rack before he kneels in front of him and begins to undress him. First the vest, then the shoes, and so forth. It is less sensual and more reverent thus being even more embarrassing.]

[It's embarrassing indeed. Hythlodaeus blushes rather pinkly, flustered by how genuinely affectionate it seems to be; he does not move, though, letting Emet get on with it. Maybe bringing his knees just a little closer together though.]

... Are you fond of being counterproductive now?

It is the fastest way to get you in that dress.

[AH. He's both amused and embarrassed that he let himself get caught so easily.]

So you did pick it because you liked the thought of me wearing it.

[He leans up a just a bit to kiss the tip of his nose.]

Of course, I did.

[He smiles, leaning down to quickly kiss his cheek in turn.]

You could have simply been more honest about it.

Was presenting it to you in the first place not honest enough? Back then I wouldn't have even done that much.

[When he's done removing the garments, he'll bring the dress over and help him into it.]

Back then it would have been me bringing you a dress like this and goading you into wearing it. And you'd refuse outright, completely red, but eventually give in to my and Azem's badgering. And wear it just for us in the end.

[But! Time for dress! He twirls around once it's on.]

So?~

I would have. I had entirely too much pride back then. Thought I had all the time in the world. Easier to push against embarrassment than embrace what I truly wanted.

[He smiles at the twirl taking his hands and pulls him into a dance.]

Though I can't say I'm any better at it now. Though now it is shame rather than pride that gets in the way.

[GOOD, HE WAS EAGER TO DANCE! Smiling happily in turn, letting Emet lead for now.]

Hmm? Should I try to push past that shame, then?

[He twirls him a few times making sure to keep focus on his face the entire time. He imagines he likes the attention.]

I would appreciate the help. Though at least now I can admit it. A step further than I was before.

[He certainly likes the attention! And definitely going to lead Emet into dipping him.]

Fufu, I'll do my best then. Though I can't quite imagine what it is you are ashamed of, given your behavior in the car.

[He dips him far enough so that his hair brushes the ground and holds him like that.]

That is in private, my dear. It is always easier in private.

Well, and to get you to blush.

[He does get a doki at that, but tries to hide the fact by being smug.]

Ah? Should I take that to mean that you secretly desire to make love in public?

[What if he picks him up in his arms even though he is taller.]

No.

It simply means it is harder to be genuine. But haven't I always been this way?

[KYA/// Yes do carry him. Hythlodaeus does love being fawned over after all.]

You have. And I think that the reason that you like me is because I can coax that honesty out of you.

[He strokes the side of Emet's face, a little mischievously, for ~some reason~ making a point of letting his fingers linger when they slip down to Emet's chin and tip it up just a little.]

[He follows the requested motion but does push further into his fingers a bit.]

Perhaps a little. But I love you for you, Hythlodaeus. Every little part that makes up the whole. Even in my more embarrassed or shamed moments where I cannot express it properly, I will always love you.

[OH NO... Can't believe he got caught in the sappy trap instead. He can't help smiling softly at that, just a little flustered but very affectionate.]

I love you too, Hades. Taking more of my memories... It helped me remember how I truly felt. How much you meant to me. And regardless of what you've done or what you think you've become, I'll still love you.

[He looks aside for a few moments, an apologetic smile on his face.]

I'm sorry for hurting you before, Hades. Perhaps if I had remembered earlier, I wouldn't have been so rash with my judgements.

[Tilting his head to catch his gaze. To force him to look at him.]

Just because you loved me in the past doesn't mean it will be the same for the future. Hardly am I the same person I was though there are echoes. And even harder to admit is that I am unwell and the scars bared will take time to heal if they ever do.

Thus, there is no need to apologize for what is not in your control.

[He keeps his gaze, even though it feels somewhat embarrassing for reasons Hythlodaeus can't really pin down. Perhaps it's simply the emotional openness of the situation.]

No. To me you are still Hades, even if changed. You are not the same as you were back then, but neither am I. And you would stubbornly keep telling me that does not make me any less dear to you, so why should it be otherwise for me?

Because I love both of you. The man from my memories and the man before me. Different but yet similar. You can be more cross than he, but your time here has also made your more caring. Given a softness to your kindness. Not that you didn't love dearly back than, but meeting new people has broadened your horizons. Shown you more than what Amaurot, even Eithrys, could teach you on its own.

I would still say that these experiences were not particularly nurturing. But perhaps you are right... and His touch does make them more bearable. So, I don't much mind anymore.

[welcome to zodiark juice.]

But by the same logic, can I not love both the man you once were and who you are now? Sometimes it seems to me that you still fear that one day I would come to despise you.

No. I would have you sheltered if I could, but as much as I wish for it that is not the reality of it.

[He clicks his tongue.]

Would it be so truly unbearable without it?

[But then he pauses and puts him down on his feet, arms loosely around his waist.]

I have been hated for a long time. Rightfully so. Thus naturally I'm more inclined to expect people to hate me. Do you know how many shards of Azem I have fought with? Other friends and colleagues and loved ones.

While it is in part an irrational fear, is there not an amount of truth to it?

Would it be so truly unbearable to sleep on the floor instead of the bed?

[He says it jokingly, mostly, but also it's still strange to him just how reluctant everyone is about Zodiark now, geez, you'd almost think brainwashing is bad even if it's totally consensual?

But he wraps his arms around Emet's neck, listening to him attentively - he doesn't want to give the impression as though this isn't important to him. It's important to the both of them.]

... I am sorry that you had to go through that, Hades. I can't imagine how I would have withstood having to fight against those I love. But - and I want you to truly understand this, Hades - I will never hate you. I would never be able to. And if there is anything I can do to dispel your fears, I will.

Zodiark is a necessity. One that we all --- most of us--- agreed upon. But one does not need their aether altered to follow Him. To believe in Him. Even we tried not to be tempered. So, yes, it is a concern not only that you are bound, but that he is needed to survive this place.

Not that I don't trust both of you. 'Tis simply a concern.

[He pauses.]

Sometimes I hate myself. An act I never thought I would indulge in. But I am listening, but the heart does not always follow. So do give me... time. A phrase I'm sure you are tired of hearing.

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